1)Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"Well, you've done the right thing," says Mommy
"But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap.".
2)At age 4, success is............. .....not peeing in your pants. At age 12, success is............. .....having friends. At age 20, success is............. .....having sex. At age 35, success is............. .....making money. At age 70, success is............. .....having sex. At age 80, success is............. .....having friends. At age 90, success is............. .....not peeing your pants.
3)A sign in a psychiatrist's clinic says: "Madness is expensive - We accept Credit Cards".
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