Friday, July 13, 2012
Kurang spasi yang fatal
Seorang sekretaris mendapatkan sebuah
PENA sebagai hadiah ulang tahun dari Boss-nya, SH.
Sebagai ungkapan rasa terima kasih, Dia mengirim rasa 'Thank You' via SMS.
Istri si Boss marah besar setelah membaca SMS di HP suaminya ...
Dengan murka ditamparlah suaminya , lalu ditunjukkan text SMS dari sang sekretaris:
"Your penis wonderful, I enjoyed using it last night. Thanks" (makanya, sekretaris ajarin dong nulis yg bener, kurang spasi fatal tuh!)
PENA sebagai hadiah ulang tahun dari Boss-nya, SH.
Sebagai ungkapan rasa terima kasih, Dia mengirim rasa 'Thank You' via SMS.
Istri si Boss marah besar setelah membaca SMS di HP suaminya ...
Dengan murka ditamparlah suaminya , lalu ditunjukkan text SMS dari sang sekretaris:
"Your penis wonderful, I enjoyed using it last night. Thanks" (makanya, sekretaris ajarin dong nulis yg bener, kurang spasi fatal tuh!)
Friday, July 6, 2012
The Bar Story
This guy goes to a bar that's on the tenth floor of a hotel. He sits down and has a couple of drinks, then stands up, announces loudly that he has had enough, and goes over and jumps out the window. Now, there are two men who are sitting at a window table, and having that natural human curiosity about the grotesque, watch as this man plummets to certain death.
However, just as he is about to hit the ground, he rights himself, pulls his feet underneath himself,and lands gracefully. He then turns and comes back into the building. Naturally, the two men are amazed. The guy comes back into the bar, orders a few drinks, then repeats the process. The two men at the window seat are astounded! When the guy returns and repeats the procedure AGAIN, the two men stop him before he jumps and ask him how on earth he does that. He replies "It's simple, really. There's an air vent down by the ground, and if you catch the updraft, you can right yourself and land on the ground with no problems." Then he proceeded to jump out the window again. Well, these two men decided that they just HAD to try this, so they jumped out the window, and SPLAT! -- made a mess hitting all over the ground.
Meanwhile, the first guy has made it back up to the bar. When he sits down to order his drinks, the bartender says "Superman, you can be a real ------- when you're drunk!"
However, just as he is about to hit the ground, he rights himself, pulls his feet underneath himself,and lands gracefully. He then turns and comes back into the building. Naturally, the two men are amazed. The guy comes back into the bar, orders a few drinks, then repeats the process. The two men at the window seat are astounded! When the guy returns and repeats the procedure AGAIN, the two men stop him before he jumps and ask him how on earth he does that. He replies "It's simple, really. There's an air vent down by the ground, and if you catch the updraft, you can right yourself and land on the ground with no problems." Then he proceeded to jump out the window again. Well, these two men decided that they just HAD to try this, so they jumped out the window, and SPLAT! -- made a mess hitting all over the ground.
Meanwhile, the first guy has made it back up to the bar. When he sits down to order his drinks, the bartender says "Superman, you can be a real ------- when you're drunk!"
I Know This Laywer
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial-a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.
You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail within 3 years!"
She responded, "Yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.
You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail within 3 years!"
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Differences between single and married men.
1.A single man will call mom at least twice a week. A married man will listen to his wife on the phone talking to someone else every day except for two days out of the week.
2.A single man spends his entire life trying to find happiness. A married man spends his whole life trying to make his wife happy.
3.A single man will party harder all the time and get different results. A married man will work harder and get the same results.
4.Single men live in a pad or a crib. Married men live in a house or a home.
5.A single man measures success by how many valuable things he owns. A married man measures success by how many valuable things his wife has.
6.A single man works for himself, the pay is great and the hours are flexible. A married man works for his wife, there is no pay and hours are not negotiable.
7.A single man plays with his dog, on average, 30 days out of year. A married man lives with his dog, on average, 30 days out of a year.
8.A single man hardly messes things up. A married man hardly gets things right.
9.A single man will spend his whole life trying to achieve his goals. A married man will spend his entire life trying to achieve his wife's goals.
10.A single man follows his 'to-do' list. A married man follows his 'honey-do' list.
2.A single man spends his entire life trying to find happiness. A married man spends his whole life trying to make his wife happy.
3.A single man will party harder all the time and get different results. A married man will work harder and get the same results.
4.Single men live in a pad or a crib. Married men live in a house or a home.
5.A single man measures success by how many valuable things he owns. A married man measures success by how many valuable things his wife has.
6.A single man works for himself, the pay is great and the hours are flexible. A married man works for his wife, there is no pay and hours are not negotiable.
7.A single man plays with his dog, on average, 30 days out of year. A married man lives with his dog, on average, 30 days out of a year.
8.A single man hardly messes things up. A married man hardly gets things right.
9.A single man will spend his whole life trying to achieve his goals. A married man will spend his entire life trying to achieve his wife's goals.
10.A single man follows his 'to-do' list. A married man follows his 'honey-do' list.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)